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Aborted Fetus Jokes

Why did the woman take her third aborted fetus to see the priest on Sunday?

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We've Got This Love Thing Down

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Lie Jokes More Lie Jokes

What's green, lies in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs?

A girl scout that got hit by a car.

Why do programmers drink coffee so much?

So they aren't lying when they say they like Java.

Nurse Jokes More Nurse Jokes

Why did the tractor trailer mechanic always have half an erection?

Because he was constantly nursing a semi.

What is a nurse in the maternity ward's favorite kind of food?

Delivery.

Fetus Deletus Jokes More Fetus Deletus Jokes

How do they perform abortions at Hogwarts?

Fetus Deletus

What spell does a Hogwarts student use when they pregnant?

Fetus deletus!

Hanger Jokes More Hanger Jokes

Why do you never see a pregnant plane?

They always go to the hanger.

What does getting pregnant and locking your car keys in your car have in common?

They can both be fixed with a coat hanger.

Starve Jokes More Starve Jokes

What do you call a bear in the Arctic?

Starving.

What do you call a starving artist from 17th Century England?

Baroque

Sunday Jokes More Sunday Jokes

Why did the black man go to the golf-club on Sunday afternoon?

Because he had a membership.

Why wasn't the fella able to get out when he fell in the river?

Cause it was on a Sunday and the banks were closed

Mancunian Jokes More Mancunian Jokes

What do you call a friendly Mancunian midwife?

Ultra sound

Perform Jokes More Perform Jokes

What do you call a dissection performed by drunks?

An Autipsy.

Why can't my girlfriend perform at open mic night?

Because she's a cover thief.