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Illumi Jokes

How do conspiracy theorists like their lovers?

Illumi-naughty

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Why didn't Santa give presents to any world leaders?

Because he thinks they're part of the illumi-naughty

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Clothe Jokes More Clothe Jokes

What do you call a pig with no clothes on?

Streaky bacon!

What kinds of clothes do protons wear?

Plus sizes!

World Leader Jokes More World Leader Jokes

Why didn't Santa give presents to any world leaders?

Because he thinks they're part of the illumi-naughty

Secret Society Jokes More Secret Society Jokes

What is the name of the secret society of weavers?

I-loom-'n'-I-tie

What do members of secret societies use when they get a head cold?

An Illumi-neti pot

Conspiracy Theorist Jokes More Conspiracy Theorist Jokes

What does a conspiracy theorist say when he breaks up with someone?

I think we should start seeing other sheeple.

How many conspiracy theorists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

We may never know the truth.

Head Jokes More Head Jokes

Why was the ink happy?

Because it had its in-de-pen-dance. I'm posting lots of really bad jokes tonight that just appear in my head, if just one person enjoys just one joke is worth it, good evening.

What do you get if you walk under a cow?

A pat on the head.

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

How can you call someone and sound fabulous?

Use a homophone.

Who's there! Buster! Buster who?

Buster tire can I use your phone!

Christmas Jokes More Christmas Jokes

What happens to all the unsold Christmas trees?

A Total TreeCull. Basically, on the evening of December 25th, every Christmas tree salesperson does the trees

Why did the kids not receive presents for Christmas?

Because Rudolph intentionally grounded the team...

Santa Jokes More Santa Jokes

Where does Santa get presents for bad kids?

Kohl's.

What does Santa and his elves listen to in their Christmas workshop?

WRAP MUSIC!