Neckbeard Jokes

What's it called when a fedora wearing neckbeard gets sick?

M'alady

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What do you call a city full of neckbeards?

M'tropolis

What do you call someone who commits piracy?

Neckbeard the pirate

What happens when a neckbeard takes drugs?

They start tipping balls.

How does a neckbeard make a scotch egg?

He has to Breddit

What's a Neckbeard's favourite curry?

Chicken tikka m'sala

What did the neckbeard say when he looked in the mirror?

M'self

What did the neckbeard say when he was punched in the throat?

M'Larynx

What does your mother and a neckbeard have in common?

They both love Ten D's

What do neckbeards like to spread on their toast?

Marma'lady

Whats a Neckbeard's favorite city in Spain?

M'drid

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What is Reddit's favorite pirate?

Neckbeard

What did the neckbeard say while giving the eulogy for his extremely flatulent friend?

Rip in peace

What do you call a dating app for neckbeards?

Tipper.

Who's a modern pirate for the 21st century?

Neckbeard!

What did the neckbeard say to the mosquito?

M'laria

What's a Neckbeards' favourite colour?

M'genta

What did the guy with a neckbeard say when he had to mail something twice?

REPOST!

Why don't neckbeards hit on people with heart conditions?

Because people with heart conditions take beta-blockers.

What Greek tragedy was written by a neckbeard?

Tips fedora "M'dea."

What does the neckbeard say when asked what he did last weekend?

M'laundry.

What's the most common illness affecting neckbeards?

M'laise.

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Tree Jokes More Tree Jokes

Why could the french man not count to four?

He could not get past the tree!

Why did the tree go to the dentist?

It needed a root canal.

Disease Jokes More Disease Jokes

What disease does a mad scientist have?

Boffin spongiform encephalopathy

What does a neckbeard call a disease or ailment?

Ma'lady

Piracy Jokes More Piracy Jokes

What do you call someone who commits piracy?

Neckbeard the pirate

Why was Sean Connery accused of piracy while drinking tea?

He took a ship.

Start Jokes More Start Jokes

What does it mean when a lion roars?

Shut up. The movie is about to start.

When do spare parts from Japanese cars start falling out of the sky?

When it's raining Datsun cogs.

Hispanic Jokes More Hispanic Jokes

How does a neckbeard neurologist address a Hispanic midwife who can't quit her job?

M'doula obligada.

How did the Hispanic secret agent introduce himself?

Bondo. Jaime Bondo.

Good Day Jokes More Good Day Jokes

Why is Valentine's Day the best day for a celebration?

Because you can really party hearty!

Who was the most active of the chinese khanes?

Ginseng khan I am in a silly mood. Have a good day

Russia Jokes More Russia Jokes

Why are cars in Russia so slow?

Because they are always stalin.

What is Russia's current Anthem?

A. "Putin on the Blitz"

Job Jokes More Job Jokes

How many Americans does it take to screw a lightbulb?

None. Their President outsources the job to India.

What do you say to a black guy with a job?

Keep at it, inmate!