Regulate Jokes

How do you persuade the US Senate to regulate the laws on guns?

Put them inside a woman's body.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

What body regulates the welfare of Santa's workers?

The Elf and Saftey Executive.

What was Carl Sagan really trying to say about the brain?

In Soviet Russia, consciousness regulates the cerebral cortex.

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Consciousness Jokes More Consciousness Jokes

What do you call a mollusc that's just short of consciousness?

A Conch.

What was Carl Sagan really trying to say about the brain?

In Soviet Russia, consciousness regulates the cerebral cortex.

Body Jokes More Body Jokes

What is the name of the guy with no body and no nose?

Nobody knows.

Why are you going through my phone?

BF: 'Do you have something to hide ' Me: 'I'm gonna have a body to hide if you keep it up.'

Russia Jokes More Russia Jokes

What does a neckbeard tip his fedora to in Soviet Russia?

M'otherland

Why does Russia not celebrate Thanksgiving?

Because they hate Turkey

Santa Jokes More Santa Jokes

Why was Mrs. Clause's stocking full on December 21st?

Because Santa came early this year.

What does Mrs Claus say to Santa when he's not spending enough time with her?

You're getting too wrapped up in your work!

Gun Jokes More Gun Jokes

How many NRA spokesmen does it take to change a lightbulb?

More guns!

What gun do you use to hunt a moose?

A moosecut!

Carl Sagan Jokes More Carl Sagan Jokes

What two games does Carl Sagan play at the bar?

Billiards and Billiards

What was Carl Sagan's favorite drink?

Cosmos.

Welfare Jokes More Welfare Jokes

What body regulates the welfare of Santa's workers?

The Elf and Saftey Executive.

Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

Why did the aquarium have an existential crisis when the dolphins were released to the wild?

It lost its porpoise.

What do you call a matador who lost to the bull?

A mat'o'gore.