Tumor Jokes

What kind of tumors do tough guys get?

Heman-giomas

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Brain Tumor Jokes More Brain Tumor Jokes

Why wasn't the patient concerned when she was told she had a brain tumor?

The doctor said it was all in her head

Oh God Jokes More Oh God Jokes

What did Bernie Sanders say when he found a dead body at a Democratic Party meeting to select candidates and decide policy?

Oh god, a caucus!" cuz he has a new england accent

What did Nicolas Cage say when his daughters grades came through?

Oh God, not the B's!

Li Jokes More Li Jokes

Why can't you trust a Lithium Ion battery?

Because they're always Li-ion!

Grow Jokes More Grow Jokes

How do you know if someone grew up in New York City?

Don't worry, they'll tell you.

What kind of flower grows on your face?

Tulips.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Why did the cowboy have a weiner dog?

Somebody told him to get a long little doggy.

How can you tell that a straight pin is confused?

Just look at it. It's headed in One Direction and pointed in the other.

Cancer Patient Jokes More Cancer Patient Jokes

How many cancer patients does it take to change a light bulb?

1 and 12 people to say how inspiring it was

How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb?

One, and ten people to stand around clapping and saying "Aww, how brave."

Joke Jokes More Joke Jokes

How do you make cultured milk?

You take it to the Moo-seum.

What do two rights make?

An airplane! haha Wright brothers :-) I made this joke when I was in Junior high

Courtesy Jokes More Courtesy Jokes

Why is it so hard to play cards in the jungle?

There are too many cheetahs. Courtesy of the St. Louis Zoo Facebook page.

What do you get when you cross a mountain climber and a mosquito?

You can't. A mosquito is a vector and the mountain climber is a scaler. Courtesy of my physics professor.