What did the retires baker say to the Dough on the table?

I don't knead you anymore.

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Retire Jokes More Retire Jokes

What's the fastest branch of the military?

The Marines. When they retire, they're corvettes.

What's a shy and retiring accountant?

An accountant who is half a million shy and that's why he's retiring.

Baker Jokes More Baker Jokes

What did the baker say about her co-worker who never sleeps and always smells funky?

At yeast he's a fungi.

How can you tell that a baker's hands are on fire?

He can't seem to *stop droppin' rolls*.

Knead Jokes More Knead Jokes

Why did the baker have smelly fingers?

Because he kneaded a poo.

What did the dough say to the baker?

You, knead me.

Table Jokes More Table Jokes

3 SQL statements walk into a NoSQL bar. Soon, they walk out

They couldn't find a table.

Why won't pigs take up jogging?

They don't like to get that far from the table.

Dough Jokes More Dough Jokes

What did the baker say after he found the dough he had lost?

That's just what I kneaded!

How do most bakers get their start in the industry?

They knead dough