Knead Jokes

Why did the baker have brown hands?

He was kneading a poo.

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Why was Doughman the only hero to rise up and help?

Because he was kneaded.

Why was the Baker a part-time drug dealer?

Because he really kneaded the dough. (please forgive me for that awful pun)

Why are pizza makers always poor?

Because they knead dough to make a living.

Why/How do bakers work?

They knead the dough.

What did the hands say to the flour?

I knead you!

Why were the baker's hands smelly?

He kneaded a poo

Why did the baker rob the deer park?

He kneaded the doe. (Doesn't work too well in text)

Why did the Baker rob the Banker?

Cause he knead that dough......... Sorry I'm drunk

Why do bakers start working so early in the morning?

Because they knead dough.

Why did the baker only date large breasted women?

Because he kneaded them.

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Why can't random men check random women's breasts for cancel?

Because that sort of information is on a knead to know basis.

Why did the man quit his job at the bakery?

He didn't knead any more dough.

Why did the baker's hands smell?

Because he kneaded a poo.

Why did the baker have smelly fingers?

Because he kneaded a poo.

Why did the baker have so many customers?

He desperately kneaded the dough!

What did the dough say to the baker?

You, knead me.

Why does the baker bake?

Because he kneads the dough.

Why did the baker go to work?

He kneaded the dough!

How do most bakers get their start in the industry?

They knead dough

Why do bakers work so hard?

Because they knead the dough.

Why do bakers go into business?

Because they knead the dough

What did the unused dough say to the baker?

Why don't you knead me

Why is money called dough?

Because we all knead it.

What did the baker say to the dough before he put it in the oven?

You are no longer kneaded.

Why did the baker bake more bread?

He kneaded the dough.

What did the hopeless romantic baker say to the dough?

You're my life's devotion. I knead you!

What did the retires baker say to the Dough on the table?

I don't knead you anymore.

Why did the Baker keep going to the ATM?

He kneaded the dough

What did the baker say to the baby lamb who stole his dough?

Oh baby ewe...you got what I knead!

When is a bread not kneaded?

When it's unnecessary

What did the baker say after he found the dough he had lost?

That's just what I kneaded!

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Cancel Jokes More Cancel Jokes

Why is it "canceled" in America, but "cancelled" in England?

Because we gave them that L in 1776.

What can I bring to your party?

Friend: A six pack. does 10 crunches cancels

Pizza Maker Jokes More Pizza Maker Jokes

Why are pizza makers always poor?

Because they knead dough to make a living.

How are a pizza maker and a gynecologist the same?

They can both smell it, but they can't taste it.

Basis Jokes More Basis Jokes

Why can't random men check random women's breasts for cancel?

Because that sort of information is on a knead to know basis.

Why don't you see many chemists with master's degrees working with acids and bases?

To really understand acids and bases, you need a pHd.

Text Jokes More Text Jokes

Why didn't you text me?

I'll never call you back. Like, ever. You'd have better luck with a telegram.

How do you get a Samsung owner to throw their phone out the window?

End your text with "this message will self destruct in 10 seconds"

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

How many men does it take to get an Amish woman pregnant?

Two men a nite.

What do you mean you're not going to spank me?

I mouthed off and everything. What kind of man are you

Business Jokes More Business Jokes

What did the alcoholic Dad, away on business, say to the bartender at the hotel bar?

I'm ready to partiem with my perdiem *sorry, not a dad, and the bar tender didn't laugh either

What is the best way to get called a,"genius?

By losing a billion dollars in business.

Dough Jokes More Dough Jokes

Why do bakers work so hard?

Because they knead the dough.

Why did the Baker rob the Banker?

Cause he knead that dough......... Sorry I'm drunk

Morning Jokes More Morning Jokes

What would the blind man say every morning when he walked past the fish market?

Good morning, ladies!

Who's there! Ben! Ben who?

Ben knocking on this door all morning!