To really understand acids and bases, you need a pHd.
An acrocat!
Because its horn doesn't work.
They both need a *break* every once in a *while*. edit: this is a three-way pun btw - it works better out loud
He doesn't need to tell him to shake the martini.
He thought nothing could possibly travel faster than sea.
Someone who takes everything literally
Ask them to pronounce unionized.
Barium
Because it didn't concentrate.
A pHD
The pizza can feed a family of four
A brain sturgeon.
