Acid Jokes

Why did the acid perform poorly?

Because it didn't concentrate.

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What do you call three brothers taking acid together?

Triplets

What happened to the hippy chemistry teacher when he spilled his chemicals?

He tripped on acid

Why don't you see many chemists with master's degrees working with acids and bases?

To really understand acids and bases, you need a pHd.

Why do people on acid listen to Dubstep?

Because if they didn't drop the base it would be a neutral reaction and they wouldn't feel the psychedelic effects.

Why do people take acid at raves?

Because there's so much base.

What do you get when you cross a hit of acid with a birth control pill?

A trip without the kids.

What happens when you take acid with a birth control pill?

A trip without the kids

What do you study to learn about acid?

A pHD

What career choice to hippies usually pick?

Chemistry, because there is lots of acid involved.

Whats another term for acid?

Its on the tip of my tongue...

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Why was the chemist not able to get very far in his study of acids?

He was only willing to consider the most basic of solutions.

Who's there! Acid! Acid who?

Acidently on purpose!

What does a chemistry lesson and a night club have in common?

Someone drops the acid and someone drops the base.

Why can't acids argue well?

All their statements are baseless.

What does a chemist say when he's pouring water into an acid?

Drop the base.

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Why is a racehorse like a letter?

They both begin a trip at the post!

What do you get when you mix birth control and LSD?

A trip without kids.

Chemist Jokes More Chemist Jokes

What did the chemist say when he caught his brother stealing halogens?

Bro, mine

Why couldn't the chemist laugh at the queens fart?

Because noble gases are nonreactive.

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

Where does He-Man keep his towel?

BY THE SHOWER OF GREYSKULL!!! I wrote this joke today. Feel free to steal it.

What does that clock say at 1 o'clock night?

1 AM feeling very sleepy.

Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happens if you game so much you forget to brush your teeth?

You get Halo-tosis.

What happens when Turkeys get the common cold?

They quit smoking.

Tum Jokes More Tum Jokes

What do you call Tums in suppository form?

Bums

What did the druggie do when he got acid?

Took some tums

Orthodox Rabbis Jokes More Orthodox Rabbis Jokes

Why do orthodox rabbis like lemonade so much?

Because, it's acidic juice.

How many Orthodox Rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Change?

Drop Jokes More Drop Jokes

What happens every year when the Time Square Ball drops?

Justin Bieber gets jealous.

What do you get if you drop a piano down a mine shaft?

A flat miner

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

How can you tell if a dictionary has been working out?

You can see the definition.

Who's there! Bean! Bean who?

Bean working very hard today!