Truth Jokes

What 3 things that tell the truth?

Drunk men. Little children. Yoga pants.

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Why did the lead acid battery have to tell the truth?

Because if it didn't it would be Li-ion.

What does the Fox say?

The truth is out there.

What else did Lochte say after the truth came out?

This did not go swimmingly at all

What did I tell you about telling the truth?

5-year-old: It's only for people who don't have lawyers.

When do you know a lawyer is telling the truth?

When his lips are shut.

What game do you play if you don't take care of your teeth?

Tooth (truth) or Consequences.

How many conspiracy theorists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

We may never know the truth.

Why aren't there any "old husband tales"?

There are. They just get re-branded as "logic" and "the truth".

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Logic Jokes More Logic Jokes

Why aren't there any "old husband tales"?

There are. They just get re-branded as "logic" and "the truth".

What's the difference between a politician and a computer?

Logic

Music Jokes More Music Jokes

What are a terrestrial planet's favorite genres of music?

Rock and Heavy Metal

What do you call a group of whales playing music together?

An Orcastra

Darren Wilson Jokes More Darren Wilson Jokes

What's the difference between officer Darren Wilson and Michael Brown?

Officer Wilson can dodge a bullet

What game is all the rage with the Ferguson rioters?

Truth or Darren Wilson.

Li Ion Jokes More Li Ion Jokes

Why did the lead acid battery have to tell the truth?

Because if it didn't it would be Li-ion.

Why can't you trust a Lithium Ion battery?

Because they're always Li-ion!

Fax Jokes More Fax Jokes

How can you tell when a fax has been sent by a blonde?

When there's a stamp on it.

What do you call a truthful piece of paper?

Fax.

Lawyer Jokes More Lawyer Jokes

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer?

We're both lawyers.

Why are Lawyers buried forty feet deep when they die?

Because deep down they're really nice people.

Light Bulb Jokes More Light Bulb Jokes

How many Soviets does it take to change a light bulb?

None! In Soviet Russia, light bulb changes you!

How many programmers do you need to fix a light bulb?

None, it is a hardware issue!

Pinocchio Face Jokes More Pinocchio Face Jokes

Why did they kick Raggedy Anne out of the toybox?

She kept on sitting on Pinocchio's face yelling "Lie to me... lie to me!"

Why did Raggedy Anne get kicked out of the toybox?

She kept sitting on Pinocchio's face and screaming "Lie to me! Lie to me!!!"