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What did the sign in the Egyptian funeral home say?

Satisfaction guaranteed or double your mummy back

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Satisfaction Jokes More Satisfaction Jokes

What did the sign in the Egyptian funeral home say?

Satisfaction guaranteed or double your mummy back

What is Stephen Hawking's favourite song?

Satisfaction

Sign Jokes More Sign Jokes

Why are you Late Today?

Teacher: Why are you Late Today? Student: Because of sign down the road. Teacher: What does a sign have to do with your being late? Student: The sign said, "School Ahead, Go Slow!"

What does the sign at a nudist Buddhist beach say?

No Bhikkhunis(https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bhikkhuni) allowed.

Guarantee Jokes More Guarantee Jokes

What does MSG stand for?

Mandarin Service Guaranteed.

How alcoholic is a drink that's guaranteed to get you drunk?

Fool proof!

Egyptian Jokes More Egyptian Jokes

Where do Old Egyptian people go to Swim?

The Senile River

What muscle do Egyptian soldiers generally lose control of, shortly before major battles?

The sphinxster....

Double Jokes More Double Jokes

Why is paper money more valuable than coins?

When you put it in your pocket you double it and when you take it out you find it in creases. -

Why did Muhammad hire Moses to help with his start-up?

He wanted to double his prophets.