What do you do at a red light?

Me: "I usually respond to texts and check my Twitter."

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Red Light Jokes More Red Light Jokes

What's that pig doing in the middle of the road with a red light on its head?

Didn't you tell me to put out a stop swine

What is a NYC nanosecond?

If you are stuck at a red light, its the time that it takes for the occupant of the car behind you to honk his horn when the light turns green.

Check Jokes More Check Jokes

Why'd the vulture check his bag?

The airline didn't allow carrion luggage.

What did the pirate photographer say?

Check out my DSL-Arrrgh.

Twitter Jokes More Twitter Jokes

How do Baroque composers tweet?

Through their twitter Handel!..... I am so sorry

Why didn't the doctor use Twitter to tell the patient that he had a deadly disease?

Because the condition was untweetable.

Respond Jokes More Respond Jokes

What's worse: ignorance or indifference?

Johnny", responds his dad, " I neither know nor care." Edit: granma grammar.

Why are you ordering so many drinks?

The dog responds, "I've had a ruff day."

Text Jokes More Text Jokes

What's worse?

Receiving a text from your girlfriend saying that you're breaking up or receiving a second text after saying that it was supposed to be for someone else

What method did SFML perform when the Human lost to the AI?

Text.GetRect()