What's the difference between a house cleaner and a thief?

The way they enter your house.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What is the difference between a creep and a kid?

I wouldn't let a creep sit on my lap.

What is the difference between a baby and a feminist?

The baby grows up and learns to stop crying.

House Jokes More House Jokes

How do you keep the Kansas City Chiefs away from your house?

Paint a goal line on your driveway.

What do you call an actor that has just paid off his house?

Mortgage Freeman

Way Jokes More Way Jokes

Why aren't the Eagles worried about big cats sneaking up on them?

They know there ain't no way to hide those lion eyes.

How do computers measure pain?

Gigahurts. (Came up with this in the car on my way to school hopefully its original)

Thief Jokes More Thief Jokes

Why didn't the man report his credit card stolen?

Because the thief was spending less than his wife.

What's the difference between Politicians and Thieves?

Thief: They steal your money then run Politician: They run and then steal your money

Enter Jokes More Enter Jokes

What did the cowboy say upon entering the German dealership?

Audi

How does Bill Gates enter his house?

A. He uses "windows".