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When you fall in love it burns and you die, right?

Yes, son. Love is terrible. "No Mom, I said LAVA." Oh. You maybe can survive that one.

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Burn Jokes More Burn Jokes

What's the difference between a cello and a violin?

A cello burns longer.

What do a burnt pizza, frozen beer, and a pregnant girl have in common?

Someone didn't pull it out in time.

Fall Jokes More Fall Jokes

Where do animals go when their tails falls off?

The retail store

Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree?

Because he was drunk Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was tied to the first one Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure

Mom Jokes More Mom Jokes

What's a GF?

Mom:if you are a good boy,you will get one when you're older. Son:What if i'm not a good boy? Mom:You'll get many.

How do you make a horomone?

You don't pay her. (My mom is sick. Hilarious. But sick.)

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

What do you with a dying chemist?

Well, if you can't helium and you can't curium, all you can do is barium!

Where does every craps player want to go when they die?

Paradise.

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

Why do meth heads love Halloween?

Three sleeps 'till Christmas!

What do alcoholics and necropheliacs have in common?

They both love to crack open a cold one.

Survive Jokes More Survive Jokes

How did Bilbo survive the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy?

Because old Hobbits die hard...

Who has one thumb and survived a band saw accident?

This guy!!!

Lava Jokes More Lava Jokes

What did the volcano say to the other volcano?

Do you lava me like I lava you?

What did one volcano say to the other volcano?

I lava you