Where are people in Dallas staying to avoid getting Ebola?

The Cowboys Stadium. Because they can't catch anything there.

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People Jokes More People Jokes

Why do they allow people in wheelchairs to bring carry-ons onto a plane?

Aren't they themselves a carry-on?

What do people with two left feet wear?

Flip flips

Catch Jokes More Catch Jokes

Why was the paper man sent to jail?

He was caught rustling.

How do you catch a rabbit?

You hide in a field and make carrot noises.

Dallas Jokes More Dallas Jokes

What's the safest place in Dallas during a tornado?

The Cowboys stadium, the only place there'll never be a touchdown

What do the Dallas Cowboys and the Rev. Billie Graham have in common?

Both can make 70,000 people stand up and shout "JESUS CHRIST!"

Avoid Jokes More Avoid Jokes

What food should you avoid if you don't want to go to court?

Sue-shi! I'll excuse myself.

What's your first name?

Avoids

Stay Jokes More Stay Jokes

Why did the spy stay in bed?

To stay under cover

What's the difference between a tea bag and England?

A tea bag stays longer in a cup.

Ebola Jokes More Ebola Jokes

How do you call someone named olaf with ebola?

Ebolaf

Why doesn't Ebola harm fruit?

Because if it affected an Apple it'd be called I-Bola.