Who's the best person to invite over for Christmas?

Charlie Sheen. Because you know it's GUARANTEED to be a white Christmas when he's around.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Why is that bear hanging out in the bar?

ME: He's a well known, gimmick. IAN: Really ME: That's Conan. Conan The Bar Bear, Ian.

Did you know that protons have mass?

I didn't even know they were catholic.

Christmas Jokes More Christmas Jokes

What do you call a man who claps at Christmas?

Santapplause!

What Do You Call A Line Of Men Waiting For A Haircut?

A Barbecue. Christmas crackers are just full of laughs.

Invite Jokes More Invite Jokes

What did the two story house say to its friend after it had just finished working out, and it's friend invited I to a party?

I'm two tiered. I came up with this at 1am, enjoy.

Why wasn't the Achilles invited into the body?

Because it was already attendin'.

Guarantee Jokes More Guarantee Jokes

What does MSG stand for?

Mandarin Service Guaranteed.

What is the 100% guaranteed way to get younger looking skin?

Believe in reincarnation.

White Christmas Jokes More White Christmas Jokes

Why did the black kid wish for a white Christmas?

Because all his white friends got better gifts than him.

Who's the best person to invite over for Christmas?

Charlie Sheen. Because you know it's GUARANTEED to be a white Christmas when he's around.

Charlie Sheen Jokes More Charlie Sheen Jokes

What's the difference between the Notre Dame Fighting Irish and Charlie Sheen?

Charlie Sheen's winning.

What do you call Charlie Sheen's brother if he were a financial advisor?

Emilio Investevez. Fun game/running joke friends in college used to play. Wondering if Reddit would enjoy the game too.