April Sale - 20% Off

Who's the best person to invite over for Christmas?

Charlie Sheen. Because you know it's GUARANTEED to be a white Christmas when he's around.

Previous Random Joke Next

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

When the cop asks you "Do you know how fast you were going?

Do NOT respond with "I know, right!"

What can I get you to drink?

Pepsi" Is Peps- Uh one moment please In kitchen, to manager I don't know, he just said Pepsi. What do I do

Christmas Jokes More Christmas Jokes

What's the best thing about having insomnia?

Only one nights sleep til Christmas!

Why is Halloween a crackheads' favourite holiday?

Only two more sleeps til' Christmas!

Invite Jokes More Invite Jokes

Why did vatican invite Bernie not Hillary?

They couldn't afford it.

How does a yoga instructor turn down an invite?

Namaste home tonight.

Guarantee Jokes More Guarantee Jokes

What does MSG stand for?

Mandarin Service Guaranteed.

Which space on a Battleship grid guarantees victory?

I1

White Christmas Jokes More White Christmas Jokes

What's Nigel Farage's favourite Christmas song?

I'm dreaming of a white Christmas.

Why does it have to be a white Christmas?

BlackChristmasMatters

Charlie Sheen Jokes More Charlie Sheen Jokes

Why can't Charlie Sheen finish the alphabet?

Because when he gets to 'P' it burns.

What did Charlie Sheen say when he won the Tour de France?

Schwinning!