Who says you can't make someone love you?

I've got a bottle of Scotch, some duct tape and a fresh batch of cupcakes, that beg to differ.

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Love Jokes More Love Jokes

Why does it smell so bad in Russia?

Everybody loves Putin!

How much do you love kids?

On a scale from Casey Anthony to Jerry Sandusky, how much do you love kids?

Beg Jokes More Beg Jokes

What's the difference between a paycheck and a D**k?

You don't have to beg your wife to blow your paycheck.

What's the difference between snow tires and slaves?

Slaves sing when chains are put on them. PS - im going to church today to beg for forgiveness

Bottle Jokes More Bottle Jokes

How did you meet daddy?

Me: Well, it all started with a friendly game of spin the bottle at the family reunion...

Whats the difference between a piano, a tuna, and a bottle of glue?

Anyone can tuna piano, but nobody can piano a tuna!

Differ Jokes More Differ Jokes

How does a woman differ from a computer?

You can actually punch information into a computer.

Who says you can't make someone love you?

I've got a bottle of Scotch, some duct tape and a fresh batch of cupcakes, that beg to differ.

Duct Tape Jokes More Duct Tape Jokes

Whats the best thing about duct tape?

It turns NO! NO! NO! into MMM MMM MMM

What is the best part about duct tape?

It can turn "no, no, no!" Into "mmm, mmm, mmm"

Scotch Jokes More Scotch Jokes

Which language does a drunk Scotsman speak?

X-post /r/puns Scotch.

Who says you can't make someone love you?

I've got a bottle of Scotch, some duct tape and a fresh batch of cupcakes, that beg to differ.

Cupcake Jokes More Cupcake Jokes

When I have complicated problems I always ask myself, what would my imaginary wife do?

And then I end up buying myself cupcakes, and shoes.

Who says you can't make someone love you?

I've got a bottle of Scotch, some duct tape and a fresh batch of cupcakes, that beg to differ.