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Who says you can't make someone love you?

I've got a bottle of Scotch, some duct tape and a fresh batch of cupcakes, that beg to differ.

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Love Jokes More Love Jokes

What's the difference between an 18yo and a washing machine?

You can dump your load in a washing machine and it won't follow you round for two weeks telling you it loves you

Why did Luke Skywalker and Princess Leia never get together?

Because Luke was looking for love in Alderaan places!!

Beg Jokes More Beg Jokes

Who says you can't make someone love you?

I've got a bottle of Scotch, some duct tape and a fresh batch of cupcakes, that beg to differ.

What did the flower say when she was begged not to tell a secret?

Chrysanthemum's the word.

Bottle Jokes More Bottle Jokes

What do you call a bottle of seltzer that lost all its bubbles?

Water...

What happens when you cross the band "The Knack" and a bottle of Corona?

A song called "My Corona"

Differ Jokes More Differ Jokes

How does a woman differ from a computer?

You can actually punch information into a computer.

How does a Confederate flag and a rainbow flag differ?

The latter represents people that win.

Duct Tape Jokes More Duct Tape Jokes

Why is the Force like duct tape?

It has a dark side, a light side, and it holds the universe together.

How is Ducktape like the Force?

It has a Dark Side, a Light side and it binds everything the galaxy together. Edit:Duct Tape I know, I was tired

Scotch Jokes More Scotch Jokes

What's the difference between Amy Winehouse, Janice Joplin, Jim Morrison, and a bottle of scotch?

OC) A bottle of scotch can keep beyond 27 years.

Which language does a drunk Scotsman speak?

X-post /r/puns Scotch.

Cupcake Jokes More Cupcake Jokes

Who says you can't make someone love you?

I've got a bottle of Scotch, some duct tape and a fresh batch of cupcakes, that beg to differ.

When I have complicated problems I always ask myself, what would my imaginary wife do?

And then I end up buying myself cupcakes, and shoes.