Why am I not asleep?

He thought, while shining a beam of pure information directly into his eyes from eight inches away.

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Think Jokes More Think Jokes

Why is your shirt on wrong?

Daughter: I think you old people call it: "second base"

How's she getting on?

I replied, "I'm not sure, I think they use a crane."

Eye Jokes More Eye Jokes

What is a ram's favorite song on February 14th?

I only have eyes for ewe, dear

Why shouldn't you tell secrets on the farm?

The corn has ears, the potatoes have eyes, and the beanstalk.

Inch Jokes More Inch Jokes

What's six inches long that women love?

Folding money.

What is six inches long has a bald head and drives every woman crazy?

100$ bill

Shine Jokes More Shine Jokes

What's the difference between a Christmas star and a bad pickling job?

One brightly shines...

How do you make a blondes eyes shine bright?

Shine a torch in her ear!

Beam Jokes More Beam Jokes

Why am I not asleep?

He thought, while shining a beam of pure information directly into his eyes from eight inches away.

What did the rude prism say to the beam of light that smacked into him?

Get bent!