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Why did little Jimmy break open his computer?

It said that it had 20 cookies in it.

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Break Jokes More Break Jokes

What do people in Florida do when their car breaks down?

Build a house next to it.

Why did the two most senior nuns in the convent break up a German terror plot to steal millions in bearer bonds?

Old habits die hard

Computer Jokes More Computer Jokes

What is "attempted theft" exactly?

I mean it's not like you see school librarians seeing a student use Wikipedia on one of the computers and puts them in detention for "attempted plagiarism"

What do the LAPD and computers have in common?

They can both burn C.D's

Open Jokes More Open Jokes

How can you open a banana?

With a monkey!

How do government employees wink when they're at work?

They briefly open one eye.

Jimmy Jokes More Jimmy Jokes

Why could Jimmy not drive a tractor?

Because he had no arms or legs. Why Because he is a potato.

Who him?

Oh that's just jimmy, I pay him to follow me around and inter- *saxophone solo* INTERRUPT MY SENTENCES WITH SAXOPHONE SOLOS.

20 Jokes More 20 Jokes

How many times can you subtract the number 5 from 25?

Only once, and then you are subtracting it from 20.

Why was 9 afraid of 20?

28 29's

Little Jimmy Jokes More Little Jimmy Jokes

Why did little Jimmy cross the road?

Because he wanted a good view of the front of a moving Porsche. RIP lil' Jimmy

Why was little Jimmy fishing in the well?

Because Tom had previously drowned in the well and everyone said "Tom is sleeping with the fishes."