Why did the woman leave her overweight husband unconscious in a burning building?

Because she couldn't stand him.

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Burn Jokes More Burn Jokes

How many dead-heads does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. They just let it burn out and follow it around for twenty years.

How many Deadheads (Grateful Dead fans) does it take to change a lightbulb?

No one knows, they wait for it to burn out and follow it around for twenty years.

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What did the hippie say when asked to leave the party?

Namaste.

Why can't Edward leave Russia?

He's Snowden.

Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

What do you call a police officer standing on dog poop?

On duty

What did Adam say to Eve the first time he got an erection?

Stand back, I don't know how big this thing is gonna get!

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

Why didn't I play in the Woman's world chess championships?

Because I ran

What's the best machine to impress women at the gym?

The ATM

Burn Building Jokes More Burn Building Jokes

Why did the woman leave her overweight husband unconscious in a burning building?

Because she couldn't stand him.

What did The Hulk say when he got trapped in a burning building?

Hulk ash!