Why should you never play poker with a crocodile?

You will lose every hand.

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Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

How did Jared lose 40 pounds?

He dumped his girlfriend

Why does the army want to only recruit married men?

Because they don't want a man lost!

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

Why does Bob Seger always laugh when he plays chess?

He thinks it's funny how the Knight moves.

How did the Pianist play without fingers?

Not very well at all...

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

What do you call an Amish guy with his hand up a horse's arse?

A mechanic.

What do you call an Italian with no hands?

Mute

Poker Jokes More Poker Jokes

What do a good bar and a woman have in common?

Liquor in the front, poker in the back.

Why don't cows play poker?

Because it's a high steaks game

Crocodile Jokes More Crocodile Jokes

Did you know crocodiles could grow up to 15 feet?

But most just have 4.

What do you call a crocodile in a band?

A crocstar