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Why won't the Alzheimer's patient pay attention to you?

Because he doesn't know the time of day.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Why do Stasi officers make such good taxi drivers?

You get in the car and they already know your name and where you live.

What do you get when you chop up a fruit and mix it with vegetables?

I don't know but it was hard as hell stealing thier wheelchairs with pieces of Richard Simmons tripping me up.

Day Jokes More Day Jokes

Why are so many people obese these days?

Because burgers are$.99 and salads are $4.99

How's the oil industry doing these days?

It's in the tank.

Pay Jokes More Pay Jokes

How many Murdochs does it take to change a lightbulb?

They were unaware the lightbulb was an issue & regret unknowingly paying to change it

What's the difference between a chick pea and a potato?

You would pay to have a potato on you...

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

Who are the fastest readers of all time?

9/11 victims, they went through 87 stories in 15 seconds

What is the difference between a human and a potato?

Time

Attention Jokes More Attention Jokes

What do you call a hump-backed cow that always wants to be the center of attention?

A drama-dairy.

What do you say to get the attention of a gold bar?

AU

Alzheimer Patient Jokes More Alzheimer Patient Jokes

How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb?

To get to the other side!

How many alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

To get to the other side!