Bilbo Baggin Jokes

Who should have played Bilbo Baggins in Lord of the Rings?

Bruce Willis. Because old hobbits die hard.

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Why did Bilbo Baggins die with a Erection?

Because old hobbits die hard. (Just a different Punchline)

Why did Bilbo Baggins live for so long?

Because old Hobbits die hard...

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Bruce Willis Jokes More Bruce Willis Jokes

Who should have played Bilbo Baggins in Lord of the Rings?

Bruce Willis. Because old hobbits die hard.

What did Bruce Willis find in the freezer at the morgue?

OC Icy dead people!

Lord Jokes More Lord Jokes

What drug does the lord use to get work done?

God speed.

What's it called when you look in the mirror and say "Jesus Christ I look good"?

Using the lords name in vanity

Erection Jokes More Erection Jokes

What do you say when someone dies while getting an erection?

He came and went at the same time.

What does an Asian man do during an erection?

Vote.

Live Jokes More Live Jokes

Why do they call a bird that lives by the sea, a seagul?

Because if it lived by the bay, it would be called a Bagel.

What do you call someone that lives next a horse?

Their neighbor

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

What game do little cows like to play?

Moonopoly.

Why do soccer players not play in the rain?

It makes their makeup run.

Old Hobbits Jokes More Old Hobbits Jokes

How did Bilbo survive the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy?

Because old Hobbits die hard...

Why did Bilbo Baggins live for so long?

Because old Hobbits die hard...

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

What did the bread say before it jumped into the toaster?

I'M BREADY TO DIE

How do we know that Jesus was made of bread?

Because yeasterday he died and tomorrow he will have risen.

Bilbo Jokes More Bilbo Jokes

What do you call a pompous Hobbit?

Bilbo Braggins

How did Bilbo survive the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy?

Because old Hobbits die hard...