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Why did Jesus stop playing hockey?

Because he kept getting nailed to the boards.

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Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

How do you stop an angry rhino from charging?

You take away its credit card

How do you stop a woman giving you head?

Marry her.

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

Why was the pig unhappy in the Minors?

Because he wants to play in the Pig Leagues.

Why don't skeletons play music in church?

Because they got no organs.

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

What is Jesus' favorite band?

Nine Inch Nails

What do Jesus and your mom have in common?

They both got nailed all night.

Nail Jokes More Nail Jokes

How is being married like puttin' on a tin roof?

If you don't nail her good she'll be at the neighbors.

What's the similarity between your wife and a tin roof in a hurricane?

If you didn't nail them properly they'll go see your neighbor

Hockey Jokes More Hockey Jokes

Why doesn't Jesus Play Hockey???

Because he doesn't want to be nailed to the boards.

Why can't Jesus play hockey?

He keeps getting NAILED TO THE BOARDS!...

Board Jokes More Board Jokes

Why doesn't Jesus play hockey anymore?

He kept on getting nailed into the boards.

What type of board will you be riding?

Jesus: looks at feet They're using boards