Johnson Jokes

What is the best thing about Dwane "the rock" Johnson's physique?

Nobody takes him for granite.

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Why did Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson have to change his diet?

Because his nutritionist said he had too many minerals in his system!

Why are there so many Johnson in he phone book?

They all have phones.

What did Masters say to Johnson?

I don't know what the worlds coming to

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Hit Jokes More Hit Jokes

Why was the storm trooper such a good dad?

He could never hit his kids.

Why did Chris Brown stop having long-term relationships?

He wanted 2 hit singles

Rock Johnson Jokes More Rock Johnson Jokes

Why did Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson have to change his diet?

Because his nutritionist said he had too many minerals in his system!

Why is Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson always so sad?

Everyone takes him for granite.

Granite Jokes More Granite Jokes

Why did the stoneworker get fired?

Because he took his job for granite

What was the under-appreciated, often-exploited kitchen contractor's complaint?

I'm always taken for granite!

Fowl Ball Jokes More Fowl Ball Jokes

What do the umpires rule it?

Fowl ball

What do you get when you cross a baseball with a turkey?

A fowl ball!

Vegetable Jokes More Vegetable Jokes

What is the worst thing about farming vegetables?

The wheelchairs are too expensive.

What's the difference between a potato and a vegetable...?

Not knowing how to use a coathanger...

Aid Jokes More Aid Jokes

What kind of aids he got?

Financial aids!!

How did Magic Johnson get Aids?

By using his Magic Johnson.

Reference Jokes More Reference Jokes

What was the first reference to pole vaulting in the Bible?

When Jesus cleared the temple.

What is an emo's favorite note?

G...get it EDIT:im not saying the reference

Animal Jokes More Animal Jokes

Which animal makes the best pie?

A human.

What's the difference between an American zoo and a Chinese zoo?

An American zoo will only have a description of the animal. The Chinese zoo has the price and recipe of the animal.