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Richard Nixon Jokes

What's Richard Nixon's favorite game?

I spy.

We've Got This Love Thing Down

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We've Got This Love Thing Down

What did Richard Nixon say after he tried to make dinner at the White House for the first time?

I am not a cook

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Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What do a woman and Kentucky Fried Chicken have in common?

By the time you're finished with the breast and thighs, all you have left is the greasy box to put your bone in.

Why do you hate me?

Me any time someone tells me I have to sleep on a futon

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

What's the only thing worse than a bagpiper?

Good question. We're still trying to find out too.

Why is it so hard for an eighty year old woman to pee in the morning?

Have you ever tried pulling apart a grilled cheese?!

Spy Jokes More Spy Jokes

Why did the spy steal the laptop?

It had a sticker that said 'intel inside'.

Where do Russian Spy's live?

In a Snow Den. (This is a joke. Please refrain from yelling at me, that he is not a spy. Thank you and have a nice day.)

Cook Jokes More Cook Jokes

What do you call an Ape cooking a BBQ?

A Gorilla

Why didn't you make all the food on that long order?

Cook: Because I'm a short order cook.

White House Jokes More White House Jokes

Why does Hillary keep bumping into people at the White House?

So she can be pardoned.

Who lives there?

The yellow man lives in the yellow house. The purple man lives in the purple house. The red man in the red house. And the blue man in the blue house. So who lives in the White House? The black man. It's better in person, I'm so sorry.

Dinner Jokes More Dinner Jokes

What is 168?

Dinner for 4.

What's it called when an Arabic author releases their latest novel after dinner?

Post-Hummus