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How can I buy the New York Times?

He replies "Ask my wife. She'll tell you how you do it.

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What did the Gorilla call his first wife?

His prime-mate!

How do you know when you're turning 40?

When your candy jar is filled with Tums..... My wife just came up with that one... Birthday is next week.. Ugh

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What did the lighter color shade tell to its dark lover?

I want hue.

Why didn't you give me anything for my birthday?

GirlFriend: You told me to surprise you.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What would you say is your biggest flaw?

I step in in people's conversations" "i was asking *him*"

Where have you been?

He asked. "To my mother-in-law's burial." "Then why the scratches on your face " "She kept resisting, that old fart."

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

Why shouldn't you buy underwear made in the Ukraine?

Because Chernobyl fallout.

Why buy expensive fireworks when you can make your own with ordinary household chemicals?

I said, and the other patients in the ER agreed.

Reply Jokes More Reply Jokes

What have you been doing for it?

She replies, "Snorting pepper."

How do I do that?

He asked. "Carefully" replied the vet.

New York Times Jokes More New York Times Jokes

How can I buy the New York Times?

He replies "Ask my wife. She'll tell you how you do it.