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How can you tell a hippie's been in your house?

He's still there when you get home. What's he say when you tell him to leave? "Na, 'ma stay"

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Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What did you like most about your last job?

ME: *leans in way too close* Leaving it.

Why does Britain love tea so much?

Because tea leaves.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How do you tell a Japanese girl you're breaking up with her?

You drop it on her twice.

When someone tells me they're a bodybuilder, I always ask "Not the Dr. Frankenstein kind, right?

Because you can never be too careful.

House Jokes More House Jokes

What do you call a man who cleans your house?

Dustin.

What do you call a horse that has been kicked out of his house?

Unstable

Hippie Jokes More Hippie Jokes

What did the hippie say when he was kicked off the couch?

Namaste

What did the hippie say when his girlfriend told him to move out?

Nah, I'm a stay. (namaste)

Stay Jokes More Stay Jokes

How do churches stay so strong?

They pray on the weak.

How did Jesus stay in such good shape?

Cross fit.

Ma Jokes More Ma Jokes

What did the amputee say to his mom when he learned to ride a bike?

Look ma, no hands!

What is the worst thing you want to hear from a doctor giving you a prostate exam?

Look ma, no hands!