How do computers measure pain?

Gigahurts. (Came up with this in the car on my way to school hopefully its original)

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Come Jokes More Come Jokes

What is long, white, and very sticky?

The coming of the Lord!

Why was Michael Jackson always late for meetings?

Because he was always coming in a little behind.

Car Jokes More Car Jokes

Why did you stop your car get out and yell "coward" at the traffic signal?

Motorist: The light just turned yellow.

What's Justin Bieber's favorite make of car?

Voltz-swaggin. I thought of this myself and I am so, so sorry.

Computer Jokes More Computer Jokes

Which football team to you need to connect up your computer?

Leeds.

What does a computer say when it encounters a skunk?

C: PU!

Way Jokes More Way Jokes

How do the people of northern Iraq manage to get so much done?

The Kurds have their ways

What is the most essential part of any joke?

The way that the punchline of the joke is delivered.

School Jokes More School Jokes

What did the angry inflatable teacher say to the irresponsible inflatable child in the inflatable school?

Not only have you let me down, you've let yourself down, and you've let the whole school down!

What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school?

Bison.

Pain Jokes More Pain Jokes

How do you measure pain?

In Hertz.

What do you call a water fowl looking in a window?

Peking duck. (it came to mind over dinner... I thought I would share the pain with everyone)

Measure Jokes More Measure Jokes

How do you measure pain?

In Hertz.

What does a cow measure its harddrive in?

Moogabytes