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Why did you stop your car get out and yell "coward" at the traffic signal?

Motorist: The light just turned yellow.

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Car Jokes More Car Jokes

Why didn't the car have a tire?

Because cars don't wear clothes.

What I say: "Does anyone need anything from the store?

What I mean: "I'm off to smoke a bowl in my car so I can deal with all of you."

Light Jokes More Light Jokes

What do you call someone who doesn't know how to party?

Illiterate (il-lit-erate)

What happens when the lights go out in a Chinese restaurant?

It'll Dimsum.

Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

How do you turn fruits into vegetables?

Drive a bus through a pride parade

What happens when the Sun and the Moon get together?

They turn out the lights.

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

What's the difference between a bus driver and a cold?

A bus driver knows the stops and a cold stops the nose.

Who do you save?

America. Keep right on going and don't stop.

Motorist Jokes More Motorist Jokes

Who's to blame?

The motorist. He really shouldn't be driving in the kitchen. (Edit: formatting)

Why didn't you stop when I shouted at you back there?

Motorist: I thought you were saying "Good morning Mr. Mayor." Cop: Right. I wanted to warn you about going too fast through the next town.

Yell Jokes More Yell Jokes

What would Ronald Reagan be doing if he were alive today?

He'd be scratching at the lid of his coffin yelling, "Let me out! I'm alive! Let me out!!"

How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F word?

Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!