How do you determine which of two people is a chemist and which is a plumber?

One of them makes crack while the other just markets it.

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People Jokes More People Jokes

Why are you letting people touch your new born?

I don't let people touch my new iPhone

What language do farsighted people speak?

Farsi.

Crack Jokes More Crack Jokes

Why did the chick disappoint his mother?

Because he wasn't all he was *cracked up* to be.

What do you call a duck addicted to crack?

A quack head. What is a ducks favorite snack Quackers. Why couldn't the duck drive his car His windshield was quacked.

Chemist Jokes More Chemist Jokes

What did the chemist say when hr found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe

What do you do when a Chemist dies?

You Barium.

Plumber Jokes More Plumber Jokes

What's the difference between a Chemist and a Plumber?

The way they pronounce "unionized"

What do a plumber and a walrus both enjoy?

A nice tight seal

Determine Jokes More Determine Jokes

Why should apiarists determine standards of beauty?

Because beauty is in the eye of the bee-holder.

How does a boat captain determine his profit?

By using aquadratic equation. (Via my coworker)

Market Jokes More Market Jokes

Why are housing prices in Toronto falling?

Because the market got flooded.

Why was the man hanging out in the market all day?

I don't know, but it was pretty bazaar