How do you get a man to stop biting his nails?

Make him wear shoes.

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Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What did the captain say to the men before they got on the boat?

Men, get on the boat.

What did the thief say when he saw the man leave his coat behind?

Let's jack it.

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

Why did the lone dolphin stop swimming?

He didn't see a porpoise...

What happens when a cow stops shaving?

It grows a Moostache.

Nail Jokes More Nail Jokes

Why shouldn't a dentist and manicurist be in a relationship?

All they will do is fight tooth and nail!

Why can't Jesus play hockey?

He keeps getting NAILED TO THE BOARDS!...

Bite Jokes More Bite Jokes

What is red and hurts when you bite it?

A Brick.

What do you get when you cross a poisonous snake with a horse?

I dunno, but if it bites you, you can ride it to the hospital!

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

Why did the wizard wear a yellow robe to the Halloween party?

He was going as a banana.

What do you think of wearing a straight jacket?

I think I could pull it off

Shoe Jokes More Shoe Jokes

Whats the difference between an Introverted Engineer and an Extroverted Engineer?

Introverted Engineer looks at His shoes when he's talking to you. Extroverted Engineer looks at Your shoes when he's talking to you.

What shoe can fit 206 million feet in it?

Honshu!