Why did Jesus quit playing hockey?

He kept getting nailed to the boards.

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Play Jokes More Play Jokes

Why don't they allow lesbians to play baseball?

When they get to third base they think they've scored

Why shoudn't you play poker in Africa?

Because of all the Cheetahs!

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

What was Jesus' reaction to being crucified?

He was cross.

Why is Jesus so rich?

Because Jesus saves.

Nail Jokes More Nail Jokes

What is Jesus's go-to pickup line?

Would you like me to show you what it feels like to get nailed?

Howdo you stop a baby from running in circles?

Nail its other hand to the floor.

Quit Jokes More Quit Jokes

Why did the cross eyed teacher quit her job?

Because she couldn't control her pupils.

What did the momma hawk say to her chicks?

Quit falcon around or get the flock outta here!

Board Jokes More Board Jokes

What did one dry erase marker say to the other?

I'm bored! (As in board) Another one from my 9 year-old.

What is a carpenters dream girl?

Flat as a board, skinny as a nail and easy to screw.