How do you get a Mormon to stop drinking all of your alcohol?

Invite two of them.

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Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

What do you need to drink out of a fruit?

A STRAWberry....I'll go...

How much has this man had to drink?

Nurse: "I can't tell." Dr: "It's ok; you can tell me. I'm a doctor"

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

Why did the integer stop multiplying with other integers of equal value?

He was Squared Straight.

What's stronger, fifty watts of sound or fifty watts of light?

I don't care but would you please stop screaming, turning the lights on and off.

Invite Jokes More Invite Jokes

What kinds of people don't get invited to blonde parties?

Women!

Why does Tom Hiddleston only invite his closest friends/family to his birthday?

He likes to keep things low key.

Alcohol Jokes More Alcohol Jokes

How do you get a Mormon to stop drinking all of your alcohol?

Invite two of them.

What do you get when you mix alcohol with literature?

Tequila Mockingbird!

Mormon Jokes More Mormon Jokes

What do Mormon's and tweekers have in common?

Both ride bicycles and bust mission.

Why should you bring two Mormons with you when you go fishing?

Because if you only bring one, he'll drink all your beer.