How do you keep a baby from crawling in circles?

Nail the other hand to the floor.

This joke may have profanity.
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Nail Jokes More Nail Jokes

Why didn't Jesus ever play in the NHL?

Because every time he tried he got nailed to the boards!

What is the difference between an oil painting and Jesus?

It only takes one nail to hang an oil painting.

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

Why can't an Italian snake talk?

Because it doesn't have any hands.

How do you stop a baby from crawling round in circles?

Nail its other hand to the floor.

Baby Jokes More Baby Jokes

What is the softest bed for a baby to sleep on?

Cot-on-wool.

What do you call it when two people make a baby in fog?

A mist conception.

Circle Jokes More Circle Jokes

What did the Circle say to the Square on the bus?

Oh no! I've got on the Rhombus!

Why is it called "the circle of life"?

Because it's pointless.

Floor Jokes More Floor Jokes

What happened when the computer fell on the floor?

It slipped a disk.

What did the carpet say to the floor?

Don't move -- I've got you covered.

Crawl Jokes More Crawl Jokes

How do you stop a baby from crawling in a circle?

Nail it's other hand to the floor.

How would you order a Subway footlong in metric countries where they don't have feet?

By crawling to the counter " GET OUT