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Why didn't Jesus ever play in the NHL?

Because every time he tried he got nailed to the boards!

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Try Jokes More Try Jokes

How's Terry Fox like Jack Layton?

They both tried to run a country and died before finishing.

What do you get if you cross a tarantula with a rose?

I'm not sure but I wouldn't try smelling it!

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

Who's there! B-2! B-2 who?

B-2 school on time!

Why did so many blacks die in Vietnam?

Every time someone said "Get down!" they jumped up and started dancing.

Play Jokes More Play Jokes

Why was Harry Potter kicked out of Hogwarts?

He was caught playing with his broomstick.

Why is it fun to play with matches?

They're lit.

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

How did the Chinese atheist get to heaven?

Jesus said to him "Behold! I am risen!" and he said "That's nice I don't bereave you."

Which gospel contains Jesus' parable about the shades of numbers?

Math hue.

Nail Jokes More Nail Jokes

Why did the blonde put her finger over the nail when she was hammering?

The noise gave her a headache.

Why did Jesus stop playing hockey?

Because he kept getting nailed to the boards.

Board Jokes More Board Jokes

Why can't Jesus play hockey?

He keeps getting NAILED TO THE BOARDS!...

What do you call a woman on a cruise ship in Mexico using the diving board at the pool?

A broad abroad on a board aboard.

Nhl Jokes More Nhl Jokes

What will ESPN talk about if both the Hawks and Rockets make it to the NBA final?

The NHL playoffs

Why didn't Jesus ever play in the NHL?

Because every time he tried he got nailed to the boards!