How do you read the Gospel According to Shrek?

Open your Bible to Psalm BODY ONCE TOLD ME

Previous Random Joke Next

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Why can't you tell jokes to kleptomaniacs?

Because they always take things, literally.

What did the mother tomato tell the baby tomato when the baby tomato was walking too slow?

Honey, walk faster, KETCHUP!

Open Jokes More Open Jokes

How do you prove that your dog loves you more than your wife?

Lock them both in the trunk of the car for an hour, then open it up and see which one of them is happier to see you.

How do government employees wink when they're at work?

They briefly open one eye.

Bible Jokes More Bible Jokes

Where is the first baseball game in the Bible?

In the big inning. Eve stole first, Adam stole second. Cain struck out Abel. The Giants and the Angels were rained out.

Why is it hard to sell bibles in Germany?

Because it's a Nietzsche Market.

Shrek Jokes More Shrek Jokes

What is Shrek's favorite book?

Don-key xote

How was the sound quality of Shrek's musical keyboard?

Nothing special, it was just MIDI-Ogre

Gospel Jokes More Gospel Jokes

Which gospel contains Jesus' parable about the shades of numbers?

Math hue.

How do you read the Gospel According to Shrek?

Open your Bible to Psalm BODY ONCE TOLD ME

Read Jokes More Read Jokes

Why didn't Hellen Keller learn to lip-read?

The braille left her lips numb.

Why don't you put an advert in the paper?

Zoo Keeper:"Don't be silly he can't read!"

Accord Jokes More Accord Jokes

How is Snow White?

Pretty good according to the 7 dwarfs

How many reindeers does Santa Claus have?

Santa Claus has 10 reindeers according to the song.