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How is it May already?

Day coming up tomorrow where people who don't know how calendars work tweet.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How do you know when it's time to get a new dishwasher?

When the old one expects you to "do your share"

Why do you love your puppy more than you love your wife?

Because the puppy only knows the tricks you taught her

Come Jokes More Come Jokes

What did you find most attractive concerning Monica Lewinsky?

He replied, 'She had the prettiest smile I ever came across.

What happens when doughnuts join a sorority?

They have to go through the glazing. I'm sorry I'm a baker it just came to me... Pun-ishment is in order.

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

What would be the best color to make a joke about?

I was thinking black, but I'm not sure it would work?

How many frames per second does it take to screw in a light bulb?

30 because that's peasants work.

Tomorrow Jokes More Tomorrow Jokes

What did Einstein text to his friend who he'd see tomorrow?

E=MC U L8R

What did the magician say when he made his rabbit disappear?

Hare today gone tomorrow.

Calendar Jokes More Calendar Jokes

Why did the calendar die?

It's days were numbered.

What's the difference between the calendar and you?

A calendar has a date on Valentine's Day.

Tweet Jokes More Tweet Jokes

How is it May already?

Day coming up tomorrow where people who don't know how calendars work tweet.

How do Vampires buy pants if they can't look in a mirror?

Now, I tweet them