What did Sean Connery say when his books fell on his head?

I blame my shelf

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Fall Jokes More Fall Jokes

What happened when the computer fell on the floor?

It slipped a disk.

Whats the difference between a bag of cocaine and a 4 year old?

Eric Clapton would never let a bag of cocaine fall out of a window

Shelf Jokes More Shelf Jokes

Where did the spoiled milk sit?

On the top shelf. Where did the chocolate milk sit In the back.

Why do Little People hate the taste of alcohol?

Because they can't reach the top shelf.

Blame Jokes More Blame Jokes

How many MRAs does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None. They just blame feminism for the darkness.

What do you call a couch stuffed with chic peas?

A hummus-sectional ba dum tish! I know that was bad. Please blame my boyfriend, he thought of it.

Sean Connery Jokes More Sean Connery Jokes

What is Sean Connery's favorite sport, and around what age did he start playing?

Tennish

What time does Sean Connery show up at Wimbledon every year?

About tennish.

Head Jokes More Head Jokes

Why do successful lettuce farmers always get women?

Because everyone knows they give good *head*.

What do you call a nun with a washing machine on her head?

Sister-Matic

Book Jokes More Book Jokes

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity...

It's impossible to put down

Why did the book join the police?

He wanted to work undercover.