What did the girl with no arms get for Christmas?

We don't know she hasn't opened her presents yet.

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Arm Jokes More Arm Jokes

Why did the T-Rex's girlfriend leave him?

Because he said he only loved her this much (hold out t-rex like arms) Sorry this one requires a bit of a visual, but I thought you guys might like it

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs laying in a pile of leaves?

Russel.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How many governments does it take to make an Egyptian happy?

I'll let you know when I find out...

When black guys say "ya feel me?

I literally feel them so they know exactly what level of white I'm operating at.

Present Jokes More Present Jokes

Who delivers presents to the hood?

Crip Cringle.

How did the townspeople react when the mayor presented them with a cost efficient, vegan protein source?

They chia'd.

Christmas Jokes More Christmas Jokes

What did Adam say to Eve on Christmas?

It's Christmas, Eve.

What do you get a kid without arms for Christmas?

Gloves, but he doesn't know that yet.. since he can't open it.

Girl Jokes More Girl Jokes

How was the party last night?

17: It was fun. The cops came. Me: What 17: Nah, it's cool. We got away. Me: That's my girl.

Why did the girl quit her job at the doughnut factory?

Because she was fed up with the hole business.

Open Jokes More Open Jokes

What is brown and sticky?

Michael J Fox opening a can of coke

Why do men like love at first sight?

Because he knows it's all over as soon as she opens her mouth.