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What is the question most frequently asked by a philosopher?

Would you like ketchup with your chips

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What do you say to an art student with a job?

Uhh, I would like the Quarter Pounder with Cheese

What game do little cows like to play?

Moonopoly.

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What's the best way to milk a sheep?

Ask Apple.

What do you ask from Santa Claus this year?

Oh, just 50 dollars, like always.

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Why are your eyes covered in ketchup?

I'm often asked by people: "Why are your eyes covered in ketchup " So I tell them it's because Heinz sight is 20/20.

What do you tell a slow tomato?

What Ketchup

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What did the Time Traveller find when he brought a joint to Ancient Greece?

The Philosophers Stoned

What do you call a philosopher that kind of wants to play soccer?

Socrates

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Why did the fishing boat captain hire an all Mexican crew?

Because in the interview they answered every question with "sea senor"

Who's sorry now?

First question on Canadian citizenship exam

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Why was the fish processing factory built beside the computer factory?

So that they could make fish and chips.

Why do Australians have a well balanced walk?

They've a chip on both shoulders