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What is your location?

Me: And you're to blame 911: Pardon Me: You give love a bad name 911: I'm hanging up

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Hang Jokes More Hang Jokes

Why were all the ladies attracted to Jesus?

Because he was hung like this. (Hold your arms out wide)

What's pink and wrinkled and hangs out your undies?

Your grandma.

911 Jokes More 911 Jokes

How many years before we forget if 9/11 was in '00 or '01?

15 or 16

What's the difference between PirateBay and 9/11?

One is piracy and the other is CONSpiracy

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

Why could Luke and Leia never be together?

They went looking for love in Alderaan places.

Why are your eyes dilated?

Me: "Your eyes dilate up to 45% when you look at something you love" Mom: "What were you looking at " Me: "Memes"

Blame Jokes More Blame Jokes

Why are Cal Tech and MIT constantly Fighting?

Because MIT blames Cal Tech for stealing their Feynman, and there will never be another man as Fine.

What do you call a couch stuffed with chic peas?

A hummus-sectional ba dum tish! I know that was bad. Please blame my boyfriend, he thought of it.

Bad Jokes More Bad Jokes

What's the worst part about being a railroad conductor?

The training.

What's the worst part of being bipolar?

The fact you love it.

Location Jokes More Location Jokes

What's really important to a bat when they are looking for a new home?

Echo-location, location, location (Replace "bat" with "zubat" if you wish.)

What's the difference between a Hoover and a Harley?

The location of the dirtbag.

Pardon Jokes More Pardon Jokes

Why does Hillary keep bumping into people at the White House?

So she can be pardoned.

What did Hillary say when she bumped into Donald after the election?

Pardon me