What's the first thing a Navy wife does when she wakes up in the morning?

She puts her clothes back on and goes home.

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Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

What are the two things someone with a face tattoo never hears?

You're hired" "Not guilty"

Why do mermaids put their things on top of clams?

Because clams are shelf-ish.

Wake Jokes More Wake Jokes

Why don't you ever callout my name when we're making love?

Husband: "Because I don't want to wake you."

Why does a montonegran man keep a chair next to his bed?

So he can have a rest after he gets tired from waking up.

Morning Jokes More Morning Jokes

What has everyone been using to get ice of their cars in the morning?

I've been using a discount card, but I can only ever get 20% off

The Sergeant-Major growled at the young soldier: I didn’t see you at camouflage training this morning.

Thank you very much, sir.

Clothe Jokes More Clothe Jokes

Where do Muslim hipsters shop for clothes?

Turban Outfitters!

What do pessimists use... Q: What do pessimists use to wash their clothes?

Deterrent.

Navy Jokes More Navy Jokes

How does the Navy separate the men from the boys?

With a crowbar

How do you know if someone was in the navy?

Oh don't worry, they'll tell you.