Why aren't you doing very well in history?

Because the teacher keeps asking about things that happened before I was born!

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Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What do you call an insect that gets exposed to radiation but nothing of consequence happens to it?

A moot ant

What happened to the guy who ingested helium?

He became enlightened.

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

Why is it hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs?

They always take things literally.

What's the only thing worse than a worm in your apple?

Reposts

Bear Jokes More Bear Jokes

How many bears does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

The bear minimum

How was the bear able to move in order to get honey?

It had muscles.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What a BLONDE will ask the doctor in the maternity ward?

"Is it mine?"

How do people know spiders are more afraid of me than I am of them?

Like, did you ask him Because only one of us is screaming right now.

Teacher Jokes More Teacher Jokes

Why wouldn't the teacher fart in public?

Because she was a private tutor

Why can't geometry teachers tell good jokes?

They go off on tangents.

History Jokes More History Jokes

Why will I go down in history?

I dunno, but I'll go down in math and chemistry too.

What do you call the history of a car?

An autobiography.