Why aren't you doing very well in history?

Because the teacher keeps asking about things that happened before I was born!

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Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happened at the cannibal's wedding party?

They toasted the bride and groom.

Why would Gabe Newell be a good president?

Because then World War 3 would never happen

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

Why don't Geordies use scales?

Because they can weigh things by eye man.

What do you call a seamstress who makes things up?

A *fabric*ator. It was a slow day at work...

Bear Jokes More Bear Jokes

What happens if the baby pees?

Pregnant wife: She won't. She waits till she's born 5: Right. Just like no one pees in the pool

What do you call a baby born at 4 months gestation?

Doesn't matter, still born.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

How many Sagittarians does it take to change a lightbulb?

Look ask me when I get back from India okay

What shall we do with all these letters begging for money?

The woman asks her husband. "Keep sending them!"

Teacher Jokes More Teacher Jokes

What do you call a teacher that's always late?

Mr. Bus (think about it)

What happened when the black man went to night school?

The teacher marked him absent.

History Jokes More History Jokes

What do you call a snake that likes history?

A HISSStorian.

What do you get if you cross history and a cow?

A moo-suem.