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Navy Jokes

What is it called when a Sailor in the Navy gets a care package from home?

Underwear Replenishment

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Why is there a flap on the back of the Navy uniform?

So the Marine have something to hold on to.

How does the Navy separate the men from the boys?

With a crowbar

What do you call a Mexican stationed out at sea?

A Navy Bean

How do you know if someone was in the navy?

Oh don't worry, they'll tell you.

How do you separate the men from the boys in the Navy?

With a crowbar.

Where does the Navy rank amongst the armed forces?

Submarines.

What separates the men from the boys in the Navy?

A crowbar.

What's the first thing a Navy wife does when she wakes up in the morning?

She puts her clothes back on and goes home.

What do armed forces at sea feel when depressed?

The Navy blues What part of the Mac's desktop would seafarers miss when at sea for a loooong time The Dock

How do you know if a guy was in the Navy SEALs?

Don't worry, he'll tell you.

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What is it called when a ship attacks their own navy?

Edit: Whoops wrong sub.

Why do they use liquid soap in the Navy?

It takes longer to pick up

What's a Navy SEAL's least favourite drink?

Canadian Club.

Why did the little pig try to join the Navy?

He loved to sing "Oinkers Aweight"

Why must you be religious to join the Navy?

Because it's a place of war ship.

Why does the Navy put Marines on board ships?

A. "Because sheep would be too obvious"

What did the Navy battleship captain say to his first mate during a skirmish?

OC I think I'm feeling C6

Why dose the navy use liquid soap?

Because it takes longer to pick up.

What do you call a snail in the Navy?

A Snailor

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Sea Jokes More Sea Jokes

What do you call 10 politicians at the bottom of the sea?

A good start.

What did the giant wave say to the man?

Nothing he just waved. Sea what I did there? Sorry sometimes I get a bit carried away, it like a tsunami of puns. Water these puns! they're horrible, I'll stop now.

Refuse Jokes More Refuse Jokes

Why did the feminist get fired from Subway?

Because she refused to make a sandwich

Why don't anarchists accept the metric system?

They refuse to have liters.

Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

What's the best way to get a hold of Vin Diesel?

IM Groot.

What's the appropriate age to take the electric shock collar off your kid?

My son's 10 years... hold on... OFF THE COUCH! brb... convulsing.

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What would you get if Geddy Lee, Neil Peart and Alex Lifeson all died in a plane crash?

Take your time, there's no Rush...

What do children think of the world?

I don't know, this is the first time I've logged onto Reddit, today.

Water Jokes More Water Jokes

What Color Is It?

In case you hadn't noticed, the color of the wind is 'blew.' Water always looks 'wet' to me. Dirt is oviously 'dirty.' Soup seems 'soupy.' If you can't find those Crayons in your box, contact CRAYOLA.

Why was the fish swimming backwards?

It didn't want to get water in its eyes.

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

What was the last thing Beethoven accomplished?

Decomposing

Why do elephants have trunks?

Because they've no pockets to put things in!

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How many Estonians you need to build a house in Finland?

Who knows, there is no tax record of it.

What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a supermodel?

Nothing if her husband knows what's good for him!

Motto Jokes More Motto Jokes

What is the motto of the French navy?

To the water, it is time! Or in French...... BWA HA HA HA. OK... I know this is kind a dad joke but.... yeah (for those don't speak French and thus don't get this, click the link and click the speaker to have it read to you ;))

What brand should suicidal people clearly avoid?

Nike. Their motto says just "Just do it".