What's the difference between a chickpea and a lentil?

I wouldn't pay 50 to have a lentil on my face...

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What is the difference between a guitar player and government bonds?

Government bonds mature over time and earn money

What's the difference between Phil Collins and Germany?

We stopped Germany.

Pay Jokes More Pay Jokes

Why should you never take a swordfish out to dinner?

Because you'll get stuck with the bill, and if you don't have money to pay the restaurant will call the cods on you. Fin.

What happens if you don't pay after an exorcism?

You'll get repossessed!

50 Jokes More 50 Jokes

What has 50 legs but cant walk?

Half a centipede!

What do you call the kinkiest/nastiest move from 50 Shades of Gray?

The Gray Poupon

Chickpea Jokes More Chickpea Jokes

What did the Middle Eastern dictator say after he had lunch?

I ate so many chickpeas, now I falafel.

What are peas attracted to?

Chickpeas

Lentil Jokes More Lentil Jokes

What is the difference between a Chickpea and a Lentil?

I've never had a Lentil on my chest.

What did the pulse say to the legume as he left?

Lentil next time.

Face Jokes More Face Jokes

Why do they want to change the faces on dollars but not on coins?

Because the only constant is change.

Why was the leper hockey game cancelled?

There was a face off in the corner