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Why'd you name me Carson, dad?

You were born in a car. Now go fetch your sister, Hospitaldaughter. It's time for tablemeal.

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Car Jokes More Car Jokes

What did the dog take when he was run down?

The license number of the car that hit him.

How does the Ultimate Warrior repair his car?

With parts unknown.

Dad Jokes More Dad Jokes

What's the difference between a boy and a girl?

His dad answers, "Well, there's a vas deferens!"

What did the dad say when his daughter gave him gravel for his birthday?

Thanks for sediments

Bear Jokes More Bear Jokes

What do you call a baby born at 4 months gestation?

Doesn't matter, still born.

How do you describe the bears?

Fast and Furious 7

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What time is it?

I don't know... it keeps changing.

What did the snake say when another asked him the time?

Don't asp me!

Sister Jokes More Sister Jokes

What did one cell say to his sister after she stepped on him?

Mitosis. Huehuehuehuehuehue

Why did the oven go back to University?

To get another degree. My sister thought it up and found it so funny she called to tell me.

Fetch Jokes More Fetch Jokes

Why did Regina George's dog only play keep-away?

Because fetch is not going to happen.

What's your emer- DOG: HE THREW A BALL BUT I CAN'T FIND IT DOG 911: He still holding it?

DOG: YES! HOW'D HE FETCH IT BEFORE ME

Carson Jokes More Carson Jokes

Why'd you name me Carson, dad?

You were born in a car. Now go fetch your sister, Hospitaldaughter. It's time for tablemeal.

Who's there! Carson! Carson who?

Carconogenic!