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Why did Santa want a divorce?

His wife made sure he only came once a year.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What's the difference between an art student and a philosophy student?

A philosophy student asks you you want fries with that

Why did the cowboy want a Weiner dog?

To get a long little doggy.

Santa Jokes More Santa Jokes

Who did the Dyslexic Devil Worshipper sell his soul to?

Santa

Where does Santa get presents for bad kids?

Kohl's.

Come Jokes More Come Jokes

If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you when you're in there?

European

What did Caesar say when was in agreement?

I came. I saw. I concurred.

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Why doesn't Kanye West take his wife to the beach?

Because he is afraid tidal wave will take her away from him.

What's the problem with your marriage?

WIFE: He replaces words with animal names just to annoy me ME: I don't do it on porpoise

Divorce Jokes More Divorce Jokes

How was my engagement the same as my divorce?

In the end, I settled.

Why Don't You Lick Me Like That?

Because Yogurt Tastes Better" The Divorce Is Next Tuesday