Why did Santa want a divorce?

His wife made sure he only came once a year.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What do you call a mentally ill person without arms and legs?

Call him whatever you want, its not like he's gonna get up and do anything about it.

Why did American football player Michael Vick want to see the film "Top Gun"?

He heard the film had dogfighting scenes

Santa Jokes More Santa Jokes

What is Santa's favorite type of cookie?

Ask your dad.

What band does Santa listen to while delivering presents?

Slayer.

Come Jokes More Come Jokes

What's white and streaks across the sky at a thousand miles an hour?

The coming of the Lord.

How do you like going to school?

Son: The going bit is fine as is the coming home bit too but I'm not too keen on the time in-between!

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What makes a grown man cry?

Watching his wife and children die before his eyes.

What did the cactus say to his wife?

Aloe Vera!

Divorce Jokes More Divorce Jokes

Why do people get divorced in the holiday season?

Because they Marry Christmas!

What did Han.... Tell Leia after they separated?

May Divorce be with you.*