Why did Santa want a divorce?

His wife made sure he only came once a year.

This joke may have profanity.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why did Mitt Romney feed his cows money?

He wanted rich milk.

Why did the customer choose T-Mobile?

Because he wanted the worst cellphone service in the world.

Santa Jokes More Santa Jokes

What do you get when you cross Groot with Santa?

A Giving Christmas Tree

What do you call Santa living at the South Pole?

A lost clause.

Come Jokes More Come Jokes

What happened when Santa cut his beard?

The police came and took statements but ultimately Mrs. Claus declined to press charges. OC

What do you call a jelly bear that died and came back?

A mummy bear

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Why were the 2 in love melons upset?

Because they cantaloupe. (The wife thought of this one... hopefully nobody else has posted it)

What do you get if you play a C&amp?

W song backwards? Your wife back, your house back, your car back, and your dog back.

Divorce Jokes More Divorce Jokes

Why is it so expensive to divorce a woman here in California?

Because it's worth it.

What is it exactly that separates man from animal?

Divorce