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Why did the blond lay out on the lawn chair in her bikini at midnight?

She wanted to get a dark tan.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What Did Superman Tell Superwoman?

Do you want to be in my Crib Tonight (Kryptonite)

Who do fish listen to when they want to hear some dubstep?

Krillex.

Lie Jokes More Lie Jokes

What do you get when you mix a dyslexic, an insomniac, and an agnostic?

Someone who lies awake at night wondering if there's a dog

What lies on it's back a hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.

Blond Jokes More Blond Jokes

Why did the blond lay out on the lawn chair in her bikini at midnight?

She wanted to get a dark tan.

How many blonds does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to hold the light bulb and two to spin the ladder.

Bikini Jokes More Bikini Jokes

How do you make the king leer?

Put the queen in a bikini! (From krusty the klown)

Why is a bad government like a bikini?

Because people marvel at what's holding it up. And they wish it would fall.

Midnight Jokes More Midnight Jokes

How old?

Woman: "Thanks, she's 34 weeks. Do you have the time " Me: "Sure, it's 972 minutes past midnight."

What do you call a fart in the middle of the night? What do you call a fart in the mourning?

A midnight snack A hot Breakfast

Lawn Chair Jokes More Lawn Chair Jokes

Why did the blond lay out on the lawn chair in her bikini at midnight?

She wanted to get a dark tan.

What is the first thing off the truck at a trailer fire?

Lawn chair.