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Blond Jokes

Why was the blond staring at a carton of orange juice?

Because it said concentrate.

Birthday State of Mind

Birthday State of Mind

Why did the blond get fired from the banana plantation?

Because she threw out all the bent ones.

Why did the blond get fired from the M&M factory?

Because she kept throwing out all the W's

Why didn't the blond want to use her phone while using the bathroom?

She was afraid someone would steal her IP address.

What do you call it when a blond dyes her hair?

Artificial Intelligence.

How do you call a blond who changed her hair color to brown?

Artificial Intelligence!

How do you call a blond who has colored her hair to brown?

Artificial intelligence!

What should you do when you see a blond with a pin in her mouth?

RUN! She's got a grenade in her mouth!

Why was the blond late on her first day of work?

Because she stopped taking the pill about a month earlier.

How does a blond cross the road?

A brunette is on a busy street across from a department store she needs to visit, and is looking for an intersection to cross over when she spots a blonde walking out of the store. The brunette waves and calls out over the traffic noise, "hey there! How do I get to the other side?" The blonde looks confused and calls back, "you ARE on the other side!"

How does a blond like her eggs in the morning?

Fertilized

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Why did the blond take a ruler to bed?

To see how long she slept.

Why didn't the blond call 911?

She couldn't find the 11 on the dial pad.

What do you call a blond that dyed her hair brown?

Artificial Intelligence

How many blonds does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to hold the light bulb and two to spin the ladder.

What was the blond doing in the middle of the sea?

Bouncing on a buoy (boy)

Why did the blond get fired from the M&ampM factory?

Because she kept throwing out all the W's

What do you call a blond with one strand of hair dyed black?

A glimmer of hope

Why did the blond lay out on the lawn chair in her bikini at midnight?

She wanted to get a dark tan.

How do you get a blond out of a tree?

Wave

What did the blond do when she missed the 66 Bus?

She took the 33 bus twice instead.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Why did the blond get fired from the boomerang factory?

She threw away all the bent ones. Why did she get re-hired They all came back.

Why does a blond wear a tight skirt?

To keep here legs closed.

How does a blond, get revenge on her blond boyfriend?

She paints a target icon around the outlet.

What does a blond and a beer bottle have in common?

They're both empty from the neck up.

How many blonds does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to hold the light bulb and two to spin the ladder.

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Need Jokes More Need Jokes

What did the math text book say to the Shakespeare text book?

Look, buddy, I've already got a lot of problems, and I really don't need any of your drama.

What do Koreans need when they take out the dog?

Oven mitts

Joke Jokes More Joke Jokes

Why do Stormtroopers never laugh?

Because they always miss the joke

How did Henry VIIIs wife enter the room?

Amble in (Anne Boyeyn) I made this joke up and am very proud of it

Computer Jokes More Computer Jokes

What do you get if you cross a constable with a computer?

PC Plod.

Why do the Avengers keep calling Spiderman over to fix their computer?

Because they heard he's a web developer

Cartwheel Jokes More Cartwheel Jokes

What's black and white and turns cartwheels?

A piebald horse pulling a cart!

What is blonde and brown blonde and brown blonde and brown?

Answer. Madonna doing cartwheels.

Q Jokes More Q Jokes

What did "O" said to "Q"?

Dude, your is hanging out

How do you get a baby into a shoebox?

A. With a blender. Q. How do you get a baby out of a shoebox? A. With a straw.

Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

Why did the agnostic chicken cross the road?

There wasn't enough evidence to find out for sure.

Why was most of Jesus' walk downtown very awkward?

Because his friend asked him when he thought they should cross.

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

Who fills in for the president of Russia when he's on leave?

Deputin

What did Elmo take before he left the tickle factory?

Two test tickles

Department Store Jokes More Department Store Jokes

How do most rappers build a following?

They go shopping at a department store.

How does a blond cross the road?

A brunette is on a busy street across from a department store she needs to visit, and is looking for an intersection to cross over when she spots a blonde walking out of the store. The brunette waves and calls out over the traffic noise, "hey there! How do I get to the other side?" The blonde looks confused and calls back, "you ARE on the other side!"